A guest blog post from Craig. “what he learned by being on an all chick tour”
I (rachel) am prefacing this with a couple of notes. Craig was an amazing trooper. He had three alpha females in a van for six weeks and was completely sweet, respectful, sometimes frightened ,oftentimes confused, but mostly the ideal dude best friend you could ask for.
But….here is what he was really thinking the whole time. I inserted notes and translation in parentheses when necessary.
1. Women smell much better than men.
2. Telling a woman “you look better natural” is not necessarily a compliment.
3. Shoes are very important;
A. Athletic sneakers don’t qualify as cool or acceptable footwear outside of the gym.
4. You really have to just let women be crazy. (I, rachel call this clause “bitches be crazy”)
4. When in doubt, always tell a girl she’s looking skinny. Skinny is also almost always a good answer to any question (even unrelated to weight).
5. The makeup place (sephora Is what He means here) is just crazy.
6. An outfit is good if it makes you look skinny - see number 4.
7.( A horrifying one for him)…menstrual cycles synching up is true.
8. If a women misses her period do not, ever, ever, ever ask casually “hey maybe you’re pregnant.”
9. Girls like to singalong and dance to music in the car. Which is weird for men. (Craig has pointed out to me here how much it just wouldn’t happen for a bunch of dudes to sing and dance to a song in the car. so true).
10. The only thing all women seem to have in common (here i think he really is referring to Madi, Bess Rogers and I) is whisky and dark chocolate. Amen.
11. If a women asks how you like her driving… Tell her how skinny her outfit makes her. (that dick… I just thought that blue dress looked great).
12. And last but not least - when in doubt, just check out. (ie - ignore and pretend you don’t hear us and pretend you’re sleeping in the back of the van).
(shit I had no idea he was faking sleeping all that time. I really just thought he must have mono or something.)
Well, that’s Craig’s first guest blog for you all. We love you lots - its been real. until next time.
Rach and Craig
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